Friday, September 16, 2005
hmmm..woke up at 8am today cos i nd go for checkup..well...i reached there at about 930am..and was praying tt he is not in the lab..but...he was in the lab..but of cos as i said he is no longing taking the blood for ppl..he is doing the lab work...hmmm...i sat there at my usual sit alone bcos my mama went duno bank or wat...so i sat and waited for my no....hmmm...den he looked out and saw mi he was like juz look awhile den turn awy..nv smile...haiz...den when it was my turn i was so so near him cos i was inside rm 2 and frm my back diagonally was him le...actually oso not very near lahz..but he can hear everything the lab tech said in the rm for taking blood...so i sat there...and was like die lahz..my veins use till too small now..sure cannot find..den really siahz...this lab tech said oh can i see the other hand..i was quite reluctant but no choice...den she search and search..hit ahz press ahz..but to no avail...den another gal..lab tech who poked mi once turned and see den say "small veins ahz..??eh..this gal..i rem her.."i was so shocked....one who only saw mi once and poked mi once remembered me..hmmm...do u thnk lab boy remembers me..he poked mi twice and saw mi every week..hmmm...today he din wear his shoes..he wore the converse tt kind...hmmm...and last time dun haf the working hours displayed now gt le..hmmm...haiz..so sian...thnk tt incident was a mistake made by me..i shldn't do tt...i regret so much..now i dun even get a smile brought by him and i oso wun get a chance to tok to him le...hmmm...this is the end...really time to let go..i actually thinking of using the old-fashioned method by writing to him to tell him my feelings but now i thnk i shldn't...haiz...wat shld i do...ppl tell mi wat i shld do...haiz..life is so unpredictable..i believe in miracles but will miracles fall on me...hmmm..really cannot take it anymore...i really think i m very ugly...haiz...okiez..enuf..hmm...cocolat signing off***
4:37 pm
